I want my stepson to live with us but my partner isn’t sure

My stepson lives abroad with his mother but he hates it – I don’t feel my partner has enough say in his children’s lives. Annalisa Barbieri advises a reader

My 13-year-old stepson has always been very insecure, unlike his 11-year-old sister. About four years ago, their mother met a man and they all went to live abroad. The boy did not want to go and would have preferred to stay with his dad, my partner. More recently, he told his mum that he has thoughts of self-harming. He also said a few months ago that he hated his mother and feared his dad could die suddenly.

Both kids adore their father, who is devoted to them (he calls regularly and visits twice a year). My partner is a very stable, calm, generous and loving feature in their lives and we have lived together for seven years. In contrast, the mother had a string of short-term relationships after she decided to terminate their marriage. For this man who she then barely knew, she left her stable job and removed the kids from their familiar environment.

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from Health & wellbeing | The Guardian http://ift.tt/1S62Ekb
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